Come gather around me lads and I’ll tell you a thing
or two,

about the way we ran the Navy in nineteen  sixty two.

When wooden ships and iron men were barely out of
sight.

I am going to give you some facts just to set the
record right.

We wore the old bell bottoms, with a winged white hat
on our head,

and we always “hit the sack” at night, we never “went
to bed”.

Our uniforms were worn ashore, and we were mighty
proud.

Never thought of wearing civvies, in fact, we were not
allowed.

Today, when a ship puts out to sea.  I’ll tell you son
– it hurts!

When suddenly you notice that half the crew is wearing
skirts.

And it’s hard for me to imagine, a female boatswains
mate,

Stopping on the Quarter deck to make sure her
stockings are straight.

What happened to the “KiYi brush”, and the old “salt
water bath?”

“Holy stoning” decks at night – cause you stirred the
old Bosn’s wrath!

We always had our “gedunk stand” and lots of “pogey
bait”.

And it always took a hitch or two just to make rate.

In your seabag all your skivvies were neatly stopped
and rolled.

And the blankets on your sack had better have a
three-inch fold.

Your little “ditty bag”..it’s hard to believe just how
much it held,

and you wouldn’t go ashore with pants that hadn’t been
“spiked and belled”

We had “scullery maids” and “succotash” and good old
“SOS”.

And when you felt like “topping off” – you headed for
the mess.

Oh we had our belly robbers, but there weren’t many
gripes.

For the “deck apes” were never hungry and there were
no starving “snipes”

Now, you never hear of “Davey Jones”, “Shellbacks”, or
“Polliwogs”,

And you never “splice the mainbrace” to receive your
“daily grog”.

Now, you never have to “dog the watch” or “stand the
main event”.

You even tie your lines today .. back in my time they
were “bent”.

We were all “two-fisted drinkers” and no one thought
you sinned,

If you staggered back aboard the ship, “three sheets
to the wind”,

And with just a couple hours sleep, you gained your
usual luster.

Bright eyed and bushy-tailed – you still made morning
muster.

“Rocks and Shoals” have long since gone, and now it’s
the “U.C.M.J.”

“BACK THEN” the “Old Man” handled everything if you
should go astray.

Now they steer ships with dials, and I wouldn’t be
surprised,

If someday they sailed the damned things- from the
beach, computerized.

So when my “hitch” is over, and the good Lord picks
the best,

I’ll walk right up to HIM and say, “Sir, I have one
request,

Let me sail the seas of Heaven in a coat of Navy Blue.

Like I did so long ago on earth – way back in
nineteen-sixty two.”