THEY RUN THE COUNTRY?
Think the world is a scary place? Read this
and you will be terrified!!!! They run
our country!
I have been a Travel Agent for thirty
Years. This is why we're in
trouble!
I had a New Hampshire Congresswoman
ask for an aisle seat so that her
hair wouldn't get messed up by
being near the window.
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I got a call from a candidate's
staffer, who wanted to go to Capetown. I
started to explain the length of
the flight and the passport
information, then she interrupted
me with, "I'm not trying to make you
look stupid, but Capetown is in
Massachusetts."
Without trying to make her look
like the stupid one, I calmly explained,
"Cape Cod is in Massachusetts, Capetown
is in Africa."
Her response (click).
****************
A senior Vermont Congressman called,
furious about a Florida package we
did. I asked what was wrong with
the vacation in Orlando. He said he was
expecting an ocean-view room. I tried to
explain that is not possible,
since Orlando is in the middle of the
state.
He replied, "Don't lie to me. I looked on
the map, and Florida is a very
thin state!"
*******************
I got a call from a lawmaker's wife
who asked, "Is it possible to see
England from Canada?"
I said, "No."
She said, "But they look so close on the
map."
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An aide for a cabinet member once called
and asked if he could rent a car
in Dallas. When I pulled up the
reservation, I noticed he had only a
1-hour layover in Dallas. When I asked
him why he wanted to rent a car,
he said, "I heard Dallas was a big
airport, and we will need a car to
drive between the gates to save time."
************************
An Illinois Congresswoman called
last week. She needed to know how it
was possible that her flight from Detroit
left at 8:20 a.m. and got into
Chicago at 8:33 a.m. I tried to explain
that Michigan was an hour ahead
of Illinois, but she could not understand
the concept of time zones.
Finally, I told her the plane went very
fast, and she bought that!
************************
A New York lawmaker called and asked, "Do
airlines put your physical
description on your bag so they know
whose luggage belongs to whom?"
I said, "No, why do you ask?"
She replied, "Well, when I checked in
with the airline, they put a tag on
my luggage that said (FAT), and I'm
overweight. I think that is very
rude!"
After putting her on hold for a minute
while I 'looked into it' (I was
actually laughing) I came back and
explained the city code for Fresno,
CA is (FAT), and that the airline
was just putting a destination tag on
her luggage.
************************
A Senator's aide called to inquire about
a trip package to Hawaii. After
going over all the cost info, she asked,
"Would it be cheaper to fly to
California and then take the train to
Hawaii?"
**********************
I just got off the phone with a freshman
Congressman who asked, "How do I
know which plane to get on?"
I asked him what exactly he meant,
to which he replied, "I was told my
flight number is 823, but none of these
darn planes have numbers on
them."
**********************
A lady Senator called and said, "I need
to fly to Pepsi-Cola, FL. Do I
have to get on one of those little
computer planes?"
I asked if she meant fly to Pensacola, FL
on a commuter plane.
She said, "Yeah, whatever!"
**********************************
A senior Senator called and had a
question about the documents he needed
in order to fly to China. After a lengthy
discussion about passports, I
reminded him that he needed a visa. "Oh,
no I don't. I've been to China
many times and never had to have one of
those."
I double checked and sure enough, his
stay required a visa. When I told
him this he said, "Look, I've been
to China four times and every time
they have accepted my American Express!"
**********************
A New Mexico Congresswoman called to make
reservations, "I want to go
from Chicago to Rhino, New York."
The agent was at a loss for words
Finally, the agent said, "Are you sure
that's the name of the town?"
"Yes, what flights do you have?" replied
the lady.
After some searching, the agent came back
with, "I'm sorry, ma'am, I've
looked up every airport code in the
country and can't find a Rhino
anywhere."
The lady retorted, "Oh, don't be
silly! Everyone knows where it is.
Check your map!"
The agent scoured a map of the state of
New York and finally offered,
"You don't mean Buffalo, do you?"
"That's it! I knew it was a big animal,"
she said.
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Now you know why Government is in the
shape that it's in!